How do I update my configuration to stop using "memcached.sess_lock_wait "

Dreamhost provides you with your site’s own php.ini, only it’s called phprc. It’s in a dir called .php (it’s a hidden directory in your home folder, not your site’s folder, so /home/username, not /home/username/websitename. Inside the directory are more directories for different php versions. Since you’re running PHP 7.4, the directory name is 7.4—/home/username/.php/7.4. Inside that directory is the phprc file. Edit that as the php.ini file.

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