I don’t want to convince you for using AiO. Myself didn’t adopted it various reason so far. Definitely community docker image is far more flexible but also requires much more invest to make it running smooth. If you are skilled this might be the better path as you have more aspects of under control. If you decided to follow community image path some of your concerns are addressed in this guide: Nextcloud docker-compose setup with notify_push (2024)
Regarding 80/443 ports - even there is no technical reason to stick with default ports this is still best practice as many corporate networks and providers block non-default ports even in outgoing direction. I would recommend to use default ports whenever possible.